


Barkeep

by SassyInkPen



Category: Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-02
Updated: 2007-10-02
Packaged: 2017-10-03 03:28:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SassyInkPen/pseuds/SassyInkPen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a short story that takes place in Sara Merry's Magnificent Seven Yellowstone AU, in which Chris and Vin are park rangers, and Ezra is a fundraiser for the Yellowstone Foundation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Barkeep

"Just where do you think you're going?" Ezra asked, stopping in his tracks as Chris and Vin turned and headed for the tiny silver trailer set up on the park grounds.

"You said you were gonna have a drink with us, didn't ya?" Chris replied, looking over his shoulder.

Vin turned around, still walking backwards slowly. "Beer's cold, I got plenty...."

Ezra chuckled lightly and shook his head. "Gentlemen, when I said that the three of us should discuss plans for the upcoming sponsor benefit over drinks, I was not referring to swilling beer in that battered tin can you call a home."

"Got a problem with my trailer?"

"No, No..." Ezra said, holding up his hands in a placating manner. "I'm sure it suits your personality admirably. It's just that I had something a little more..._civilized_ in mind."

"Civilized." Chris's voice was flat and carried the distinct ring of irritation.

Ezra sighed and rolled his eyes. "Could we dispense with the posturing, please? I mean no harm by it, and I'd think that by now you all would know that. I cannot pretend to be something I'm not. And I'm certainly not about to be drinking beer in such close quarters with Paul Bunyan and Grizzly Adams." With that, he turned on his heel and strode towards his Mercedes, calling, "Drinks are at my place, you know the way."

After a moment, Vin said casually, "Are you Paul or Grizzly?"

"I'm Paul, you're Grizzly."

*****

When Chris and Vin pulled into Ezra's driveway, the lights were already on inside, sparkling through the beveled glass like jewels. They got out and slammed the doors of the big Ford, looking at each other dubiously before heading up to ring the bell.

When Ezra let them in, Chris strode into the foyer and snorted loudly, making a vulgar wet rattling sound deep in his throat. Vin smirked and ambled in after him, smacking at the front of his shirt, and smoothing wrinkles from his sleeves. "I hope this shirt don't stink too bad, Ezra, it was at the top of the hamper, so it should be pretty good, I think."

He raised an arm to sniff at his at his pit, and Chris leaned in to do the same, before belching loudly.

Ezra leaned on the handle and glanced skyward, licking his lip. "Very amusing," he said, closing the door. "You two should consider Vaudeville."

"Well now, Ezra," Chris said cheerfully, "We can't be anything 'cept what we are..."

Ezra nodded and gestured toward the study. "Shall we?"

 

****

 

"I thought we were comin' over for drinks, not dessert," Vin said checking out the vast array of bottles, dishes of fruit and glasses that Ezra had spread out over the bar.

"You are," Ezra muttered as he tapped the arrow key of the laptop computer he had set up at one end. "I've been taking a few bartending seminars lately, trying to expand my repertoire. I intend to woo you with my latest creations." He looked up at them and grinned broadly.

"I don't need any wooing," Chris said. "Just give me a whiskey or somethin'."

"Nonsense," Ezra said breezily as he measured liquor into a tall silver shaker. "I need guinea pigs, and you're perfect for the job." He leaned over to peer at the computer screen, consulting it before taking up another bottle.

"Since when did you wanna become a bartender, Ezra?" Vin asked, watching the show with bemusement.

Ezra clucked his tongue. "I don't want to _be_ a bartender, I just want to expand my skills a little. It's becoming increasingly more common that I find myself entertaining prospective donors here in my home, and if I am to convince them to part with their hard earned money, it helps if I can easily whip up their favorite beverage. Whatever that may be."

After pouring in a jigger of bright red liquid, Ezra fitted on the top and gave the whole thing a good solid shake. He looked smug as the ice and liquor made an almost musical sound against the stainless steel. A thin veil of frost formed on the outside. After a few moments, he opened it and poured the contents into three tall glasses, already filled with ice. Then he topped each one with a slice of pineapple and a gleaming cherry.

"And just what the hell might this be?" Chris asked with a disconcerted look on his face.

"That, my friend, is a Singapore Sling."

"It's _pink._"

"I happens to be world famous," Ezra said, poking a straw into each one and sliding glasses toward them. "Originating at the Raffles Hotel in Singapore almost a hundred years ago."

"It's pink," Chris repeated.

Vin slid onto a bar stool and pulled his drink over. "I think it's right pretty, Ezra," he said, taking a sip.

"Thank you. It's sufficiently complicated, and fancy enough to make anyone think I'm gong to a great fuss over them, but carries the respectability of a colorful history."

"Tasty, too," Vin added. He elbowed Chris and said, "Quit makin' faces and drink your big pink sissy drink."

Ezra sighed. "It is a very popular cocktail among wealthy and well traveled people who have a little class and dignity. Not to mention attractive women who have a lot of money."

Chris shook his head. "You're planning to use this to take advantage of nice women?"

Ezra looked stricken. "I am merely attempting to show these ladies a little special treatment, and if they should happen to want to return the favor, who am I to argue?"

"You're disgusting, you know that?"

"I am in the business of making people feel good," Ezra protested. "When these people leave my company, they feel that special glow that comes from helping others, and they sleep well in the knowledge that our nation's great natural resources are being cared for."

"Yeah, not to mention your manicure," snorted Vin.

"You seem to be about dry there," Ezra said wryly, noting Vin's empty glass. "Can I make you another?"

Vin grinned. "Don't mind if I do." Chris glared at him and Vin shrugged, adding, "What? I'm not drivin' tonight." He flashed a wicked smile.

Chris arched an eyebrow and turned to Ezra. "Make the next batch nice and strong."

Ezra feigned shock. "Why...you're not planning to use this to take advantage of a nice young man, are you?"

Chris just smiled and took a sip of his big pink sissy drink.

END


End file.
